Fading from Memory

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Sunday 23 November 2008

Falling over

Every day for several weeks now I have been posting letters to organisations, first informing them of dad's death and asking what they would like me to do about closing off his affairs with them, then responding to their requests, then responding to their further requests. My earlier impressions, which were that utilities companies, insurers, and government departments' interests extend to delaying payouts and covering their own arses, has remained unchallenged by any signs of helpful behaviour on their part. The one quick result we got, without the need for any documentation, was the increase in mum's UK state pension. Hardly suprising though, as the increase in her pension was about 20% of what they had been paying dad. To them, therefore, it was an instant saving to be realised, and the resultant efficiency is remarkable only for its impersonal execution.

That's not what has prompted me to write though.

I just heard that mum had a fall on Tuesday, in the common room. Greg was notified at 6:30 pm, just after it happened, and again when the ambulance arrived to take mum to hospital. The hospital also called to say that mum had arrived. After examination mum was determined to be all right and was discharged, so that she was back at the home for the night.

Then, on Thursday, she apparently fell out of bed. This time there was no treatment as she, presumably, didn't appear to be hurt.

Then, yesterday (Saturday), she fell off her chair while sitting at the table. She was again taken to the hospital, and is there now, sedated and bruised about the face. A urinary tract infection is suspected.

The communications to the hospital have been as difficult as ever. And the confusion over what has been going on seems to have reared its ugly head once more. A doctor at the hospital has prescribed antibiotics for the UTI, under the impresssion that mum has been on these for two weeks. This is news to us. The staff at the home think that it may be worth taking mum off the Risperidone, as this may be making her drowsy and unsteady. This is defrinitely worth a try, I think, and I hope that mum does not resume her aggressive behaviour. If she does, it begins to look remarkably like the scenario we've just been through with dad: behaviour that is considered unmanageable without stronger drugs, a prescription that puts him out of action, reduced mobility, reduced appetite, poor sleep and the inevitable host of ancillary problems that come with that.

I need to speak to Greg and Rachel about finding an alternative hospital, too. Nothing about the one mum is in has ever made us feel good.

Friday 31 October 2008

Amateur Hour

The NSW Registry of Births Deaths and Marriages has just convinced me that New South Wales is a bad place to die. I think it was on 10th October that I contacted them to say that dad's death certificate was full of errors, and I was told that some form was being sent out to me. Well, that never arrived. So, I called the Registry again today, waited the obligatory few minutes while inane 'messages' were spoken at me, and then explained the whole story once more.

This time I was told that a form could be sent out, no problem about that, but that there was rather a backlog and we would not get a corrected death certificate for about three months. I was instead advised to take the original document, in person, to the Registry office in Sydney, and wait in line. Apparently, if I get there early (they open at 8:30 am) I might be able to get the corrected form later the same day.

How cheering and helpful this all is. Meanwhile, I have collected a few more 'deceased estate' forms. The bureaucracy is frankly overwhelming. Several companies demand original documents. Nearly all want to see documents that have been notarised. I can see days of form-shuffling going up in smoke.

The lesson appears to be this - get your elderly parents to simplify their affairs as much as possible before they die, before they get too demented to do anything, and before they start losing papers - if you can. And good luck.

Thursday 30 October 2008

Reappearances

Last weekend a woman in England contacted me to say that her recently deceased father had been on the same ship as my father, when they were torpedoed during the Second World War. After a couple of email exchanges, she sent me a photograph of the survivors. My father is among them, standing at the back, but nearly a head taller than everyone else, looking young, confident, fresh-faced and excited by life. This is a photograph that none of us have ever seen before, yet it was so clearly dad, so easily identifiable, that when I forwarded it to Greg, Rachel and Derek there was no need to point dad out.

It was nearly 67 years ago. It staggers me to think that that photograph has been in existence, in the custody of strangers who had quite independent reasons for preserving it, but that it has finally come to us, only a few weeks after dad's death. And the contrast between how dad looked then and how he looked the morning he died just serves to emphasise what a long long way we travel in a lifetime.

Some weeks ago I had a rather unusual dream. Dad was standing to my left. I recall vividly that he was wearing a check shirt and seemed considerably shorter than I am, and than he was himself in his prime. In the dream I was having to explain to him that he was dead. Bizarrely, I was using all sorts of colloquilisms - or euphemisms, perhaps. 'You've kicked the bucket, dad. You're pushing up daisies.' 'Am I? he said. He wasn't taking it very well. His reaction was that of confused resignation, a feeling that things were just out of his control and could not be improved, that what he had hoped for was now unattainable. As the conversation wore on I was telling him he had to go, that there was no two ways about it, so he might as well just accept it. It was certainly not pleasant, but nor was it unpleasant. it just took place.

Thursday 23 October 2008

More threads

Going through the paper work is a big job. After reading everything related to, say, a life insurance policy, I make notes of the questions and most vital pieces of information I have. Then I call the insurance company, whose name has invariable changed since the policy was taken out. I explain the situation, and the person I talk to always says, 'I am sorry for your loss.' I always reply, 'It's OK.' And it is. They don't need to say anything, and in fact that would be preferable. The other thing that seems to be invariable is that every company, whether a phone company or an insurance company, has the equivalent of a 'deceased account process', which always begins with them sending me a 'pack' or, at minimum, a form. Not one of these packs has arrived yet, and I still haven't received the form the Registry of Births Deaths and Marriages promised me so, really, nothing has been achieved.

I went over to the house today and collected the mail. I also had a look around. The outside woodwork has been painted dark green to match the deck Greg and I built a few years ago, and looks very good. Doors and gates and gutters have been fixed. Inside, the floorboards have been sanded down and glazed, and they look good too. Everything above floor level has been painted white. It has made the house look bland, but has brought a lot more light into it, and it probably what tenants will want. We expect to have it let within a month.

The next stop was to see mum. She was having dinner when I arrived, and was fully occupied. She reminded me of a small animal, so intent on her food and so few other concerns. I stayed out of sight, not wanting to spoil her meal. Earlier in the day Rachel had attended a meeting at the home and had offered to donate dad's clothes to them. The offer had been accepted, so I got some assistance and brought them all in , stacked on a wheelchair. They've been in my car boot for several weeks. These garments are going to go into the communal mix now. It will be very odd to visit mum and see all the old blokes around her wearing dad's old clothes. It is a good job she won't recognise anything. She seemed pretty cheerful, was looking well, and has continued to put on weight. If anything, she may be getting a little fat now. She mumbled away to me about things. I kept nodding and agreeing, and eventually faded away after about 20 minutes, as her attention was drawn away by an imminent sing-along.

One of the things that really surprises me at the home is how well the staff remember me, and always know who I am there to visit. They always seem to remember who else has been there recently too, Rachel or Greg. I mentioned this to Greg today and he suspects that it is no great feat of memory, that the explanation is that very few of the residents get visitors, and we are an anomaly. I had never thought of this, but it could be true. The fact that the home was so keen to get dad's clothes seems to suggest that other families are not providing enough for their own elderly relations.

Oh, yes. I forgot to ask what had been decided about dad's ashes. We haven't finished with the morbid jokes. One suggestion for what to do with the ashes was to scatter them in the garden that he was never very interested in - 'You didn't make your bed. Now you can lie in it.' Another was that we sprinkle them on mum's porridge. There's plenty of carbon and calcium in ashes, presumably, and recycling is all the rage now.

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