I've just hung up on my father. There really was no point talking any more. He wasn't really listening to anything I said, and he wasn't telling me anything he hadn't already told me dozens of times today. He has, I will be frank, messed up the whole day for everyone around him.

I made appointments with their doctors for each of my parents, for a medical report required by the Russell Retirement Village. The nearest I could get the appointments was 12:30 and 2:15. I knew this was going to take a big bite out of my day, but it could have been worse.

At 11:30, when I arrive at the house I find that dad has lost the key to the lock on the gate, and he cannot get it open. He is talking about this non-stop, and has already driven my mother to distraction. She has left her lunch untouched on the table, while dad's is already finished. It appears he has driven her away from her food.

Before I attend to anything else, I have to try to sort this out. I search the house, with dad following me, still going on about what a problem this is. Already I am getting irritated and ask him to drop the subject.

'I'll sort it out,' I say.

He keeps on and on. I say, 'don't worry about it,' and almost bite my tongue, because I know exactly what will come next:

'Oh, I'm not worried. It's just that...'

And he's off again. Round and round. I shall spare you the details. Suffice to say that I sorted this problem out under a torrent of commentary from dad.

I got dad to his doctor.

I sorted out a variety of other problems and things that required attention.

I got mum to her doctor.

At 3:00 I brought mum home and made coffee for us all. Dad kept asking mum, over and over again, what she had done while we were out. Mum couldn't remember. Dad told her she must be able to remember, it was only a few minutes ago. I tried to silence him, unsuccessfully. I pointed out that mum was getting irritated. He said it wasn't his fault she gets irritated. On and On. I had to leave, warning him that I had given him my best advice, and it was up to him to follow it or ignore it.

He ignored it. At about 4:00 he called me to complain that mum was denying that she had been for an outing with me today. I said, 'what does it matter whether she thinks we did or we didn't?' He wasn't making any sense and I couldn't get him to say what he wanted me to do. I advised him again to just drop it.

About an hour later he called again. Pretty much the same story. He complained that mum was saying she hadn't been to the doctor. There was a scuffle and mum came on the phone, obviously very upset.

'Do you know?' she says.
'It's all right mum,' I say. 'Stop talking about it. Put the TV on and watch some TV instead.'
'Yes,' she agrees, then asks 'Do you know who he is?' (meaning my father or, to her, the man who hangs around her house driving her mad with pointless questions.)
'Yes, I know him,' I say.
'Do you know me?' she asks. I'm really surprised by this question, but I answer:
'Yes, mum. I know you.'
'Oh, thank you,' she says.
There's another scuffle and it is dad on the line again. Same bloody self-justification. Same bloody blaming mum for whatever he thinks the problem is, same bloody everything over and over again. I butt in several times to try to break the flow, but nothing I say can steer him away from his idee fixe. I've already got a headache from clenching my teeth for so long today. I try to point out that two hours ago he had already gone on about this subject far too much, and it is no wonder mum is irritated. I say I am too. Still no change! Back to:
'Well, all I asked was...'

It is quite unbelievable. I realise there is nothing to be gained by talking any more, and hang up. He doesn't call back.