Greg called me today to say that he had had a call from the hostel manager, who had told him that dad had literally broken out of the hostel (breaking the lock in the process), and she was wondering whether he ought to be moved to a more secure section. The more secure section she mentioned actually caters to people with worse dementia than mum. Something didn't add up to me.

OK, Greg said that the staff had had to keep reminding dad to take a shower each day, whereas most people in his hostel simply do this automatically. Dad's section is not staffed as well as mum's, in the expectation of lower needs of course.

Still, this didn't add up to enough reason to transfer dad to a dementia section.

Greg went over to the village later in the day to try to sort things out. Of course he offered to pay for the repair of the lock, knowing full well the benefits in taking the cooperative and conciliatory approach. The offer was declined, presumably repairs of this kind are already factored into the costs of running the village. In his discussions with the various managers of various hostels, the conclusion is simply this, dad's manager is perhaps over-sensitive to losing residents, as she lost one for two-and-a-half days not so long ago, but otherwise the managers there seem unanimous that dad is in the right place for now. We all know that at some stage he will need to follow mum, and later on move to even less pleasant surroundings that will resemble more and more those of a hospital. We all know that and accept it. However, for dad's quality of life he is much better off with people who can converse, read newspapers, play bowls and so on.

This is for their good too. They would be asking for big trouble if they tried to move dad in with the more seriously  demented.

One thing that has come out of this is that the staff now realise that dad's move to the hostel is a one-way journey. I am still only slowly coming to that realisation myself.

Meanwhile, the cats are starting to accept their new surroundings. I have embarked on a mission to train them to use the toilet like any decent human being. So far, I have got both of them jumping up on to the toilet to use the litter tray, but each of them has a lot to learn. They sit on the tray and urinate over the side onto the floor tiles. I wipe it up with kitchen towels and then mop the floor. They sit and watch me do this, then come in and repeat their performance. I have been very angry about this, but I cannot let it show, as they have really both done well in learning what they have in only three days.